TLDR:
– Financial support from parents can either catalyze or inhibit a young adult’s emotional maturity.
– Many parents struggle with setting limits when it comes to subsidizing their adult children.
Financial support from parents can have a significant impact on the emotional maturity of young adults. Some forms of financial support can spur separation and growth, while others may hinder a young adult’s progression into independence. Many parents struggle with setting limits when it comes to supporting their adult children financially. While some support, such as paying for college tuition or helping with essential expenses, may be legitimate and necessary, other forms of support can undermine a young adult’s growth.
Examples of questionable financial support include continuing to pay for college tuition when courses are being dropped or not passed, consistently bailing them out of credit card debt, covering parking tickets or traffic violations, or providing unrestricted financial allowances for recreational activities. Additionally, some parents may inadvertently create a cozy, comfortable environment at home that lacks motivation for their young adult to move out. In these cases, life at home may be so enjoyable that there is little incentive for the young adult to make the effort to leave.
On the other hand, some parents may be too stingy or stringent with their financial support, unaware of how the economic world has changed and how they may be holding their child back. Examples of this approach include refusing to pay for necessary car repairs or declining to assist with a security deposit for a new apartment. It is crucial for parents to examine their own monetary history and their family-of-origin’s financial practices to understand how it influences their decision-making. This reflection can help parents evaluate whether their financial support is helping or hindering their young adult’s emotional maturity.
Questions for self-reflection include:
– What lessons about money did you learn growing up?
– How well-off or impoverished did you feel during childhood and adolescence, and how did that change as you left home?
– How has your gender, ethnic background, and religious beliefs influenced your attitudes towards money?
– Were you treated differently from your siblings regarding money?
– What financial expectations did your parents and you have when you were preparing to leave home?
Understanding one’s relationship with money can provide insights into the motivations behind financial support decisions. Parents should strive to strike a balance between providing necessary support and encouraging their young adult’s independence. By finding this balance, parents can foster emotional maturity and personal growth in their children during the transitional period of leaving home.
